Probably the most important predictor of whether counselling will be successful is the quality of the relationship between the counsellor and the client. Choosing a counsellor that’s the right fit for you is so important. You need someone that’s going to work well with you, to ensure that the counselling process is supportive and productive. Here are 5 ways to know if your counsellor is the right fit for you.

They work on the things that are important to you

Your counselling appointment is your time. It’s vital that this time is used to work towards the goals that you’ve identified, or to chat about issues that are important to you. A counsellor should begin the session by asking what you’d like to discuss, and focus on the things that matter to you. Your counsellor shouldn’t try to steer you towards the issues that they believe are important, or set the agenda for sessions without asking for your input and consent.

They don’t push their values or opinions onto you

It’s super important that your counsellor helps you to find solutions and tools that are right for you. This means taking into account your beliefs, values and resources. You should never feel as though your counsellor is steering you towards a particular choice, or judging you for the choices that you’re making. Ultimately, you’re the expert of your own life, and your counsellor should respect your choices and provide a safe space for you to explore your options.

You feel safe to open up to them

Counselling is a really vulnerable process. You might be coming to your appointment with an issue or concern that you’ve never shared with anyone else. It’s incredibly important that you feel safe to open up to your counsellor. That means trusting that the things that you say are going to be well-received, without judgement or criticism. It also means that you feel confident that your information will remain private and confidential.

They accommodate your needs

A counsellor will be a good fit for you if they understand your personal needs and work with you to accommodate them. This could include things like offering appointments at times that suit your schedule, giving you the option of telephone appointments or camera-off online sessions, allowing flexibility with session frequency or meeting sensory or access needs. It also means that your counsellor will work on issues in a way that suits you, not pushing you to discuss things before you’re ready, and providing opportunities to move between topics or take breaks if needed. It’s important that you feel able to raise your needs with your counsellor, and have them respected and accommodated as much as possible.

They have good boundaries

A good counsellor will maintain clear professional boundaries. That means that they have set clear parameters for what you can expect from a session, they stick to the session duration and communicate with you in a professional manner. Your counsellor should also remain focused on you throughout your session, and not bring their own challenges or issues into the counselling space with them.

Choosing the right counsellor is really important to make sure that you feel safe and supported throughout the counselling process. I like to give you the opportunity to get to know me a little before we begin working together, so that you can make an informed choice about whether I’m the right counsellor for you. My About Me page features the story of how I became a counsellor and my background and training to give you a feel for who I am. I offer a free 10 minute phone consultation for new clients, to give you a chance to ask any questions and get a feel for how I work so that you feel comfortable booking an appointment. You can contact me directly to ask a question, or book a consultation or full appointment online.